Here we will not discuss the morality or immorality of pre-marital sex. Some pre-marital sex will always occur. When it occurs, it can and should be healthy, and responsible, and as safe as possible.
Safe: In pre-marital sex, the chance of disease (including HIV) can never be completely eliminated, but it can be greatly minimized.
Healthy: In order to be healthy, it must not only be safe from disease, but must also involve self-control and avoid excessive indulgence.
Responsible: Anyone who indulges in pre-marital sex must take precautions to avoid conception of an unborn child. If an unborn child does result, they must be prepared to make big sacrifices to give it a healthy and happy life.
Now let’s say a little more about “safe, healthy, and responsible.”
Safe: Outside of a faithful marriage or other faithful monogamous relationship, condoms should always be used. However, condoms are not foolproof against HIV and other sexually-transmitted diseases (STD’s). If one is promiscuous (has multiple sexual partners), the risk of infection increases.
Healthy: Traditional medical schools of India, including ayurveda and yoga, have taught that sexual intercourse and masturbation, if indulged in too frequently, are harmful to the health of both men and women. The conventional medical community is sceptical about such harm, yet many experienced coaches of sports teams prohibit their players from having sex before games. Muhammad Ali, perhaps the greatest boxer of all time, used to abstain from sex for six weeks before a fight.
And another problem with the conventional, Western, view: what ayurveda and yoga teach is that too much sex will adversely affect the concentration power of the mind, even before all that sex affects the physical body – and Western sources seem to have studied only possible effects on the body, and seem to have made no attempt to study possible effects on the mind.
If you do decide to have sex, try having it no more than four times a month and see if you experience a high energy level.
Responsible: Unless the woman has passed menopause or has had her uterus removed, it is always possible that sex may result in an unborn child. An unborn child deserves our love and protection just as much as any child. Anyone who indulges in pre-marital sex should try their best to avoid conception, but if an unborn child does result, it is the most helpless member of our human family, and we must be prepared to make big sacrifices for it. We will find that when we live for a child, and not for ourselves, we actually become happier than we have ever been.
Techniques for avoiding conception consist of natural family planning (NFP) and various kinds of contraception. Techniques of contraception include condoms, vasectomies for men, hormonal contraceptives (pills) for women, and various techniques involving a woman’s internal organs, such as intra-uterine devices (IUD’s). Only NFP and condoms are free from side-effects, and people should educate themselves about the side-effects of other techniques.
